Chicken Soup & Lessons in Humility

Last week, my husband wasn’t feeling well. (Cue sad violin.) It’s never fun when someone else is sick, especially when you live with them and eat with them and go to bed with them every night. So, as a loving, caring, worrying wife, I tried my best to make nice food and do what I could for him.

Unfortunately... it didn't work out as I planned.

I made delicious dinners and offered tea and did so much of what I thought would help him. However, nothing really seemed to work. I started actually getting frustrated - was there something else wrong? Were we finally losing the romance of our honeymoon stage?!

Finally, in a moment of honesty, he pinpointed the problem. “You’re making all these efforts to love me, but you aren’t checking what I really need... you’re just guessing based on what you would want.”

My little heart. It hurt, but it was true. I had assumed he would be overjoyed with a garlicky tomato pasta dish, when all he wanted was udon with egg soup. All because I hadn't taken a moment to check with him, convinced I could read his mind. (Spoilers, I can't.) If you've ever read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, you'll remember that what some of us receive as love isn't actually how others best receive it. In friendship and in marriage, we have to learn which 'language' means the most to the other person. I had done my best communicating in my language, but hadn’t made any efforts to speak his.

I had to humble myself and realise I don’t know everything about my husband yet. I can’t read his mind. I need to ask him to help me help him. So finally, the next night, I asked if chicken soup sounded good for dinner. He said yes, he’d love that, and gave a couple of requests. And this beautiful soup was born, of love and humility and gratitude that God teaches us things even in bouts of sickness. 

The garlicky tomato pasta on the side was all mine. My husband got okayu, pictured at the top - a Japanese rice porridge often eaten when sick.

I mostly followed this recipe from Harumi’s book, tossing in some grated ginger, subsituting asparagus for the udo, and adding in chicken and some shredded cabbage we had in the fridge. Delicious, warming, and comforting for unwell days. Enjoy serving it to someone you love! (Or yourself for that matter, it's certainly good enough.)